The Unluckiest Man In the World
This storyline provided by: Vinh
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You know the old saying “Anything that can go wrong, will”? They call it Murphy’s Law — Well I may as well be Murphy himself, but no, that would be too convenient. My name is Harry, last name Butts. Unfortunate I know, but trust me, I’ve gotten over it by now. I am arguably, the unluckiest man in the world. Oh - What’s that? You don’t believe me? Well you should.
It all started when I was in kindergarten on the walk home from school, I spotted something shiny sticking out of the ground and proceeded to dig it up. What it was I did not know at the time, but I brushed some of the soil off of it with my shirt tail and that was what activated it.
A piece of space age technology? Maybe. A magical genie lamp? Just as plausible. But whatever it was, it came out of that piece of metal and into me. I tripped 72 times the rest of the way home, and got grass stains all on my pants. I didn’t get my first kiss until the night of my highschool promenade, and I only got it because I accidentally caused Cynthia to slip on some punch I had spilled and she fell right on top of me (lips included), I got my first slap across the face not too long after.
What’s worse than all that is that I can’t shake this thing —Lady Luck’s twisted and deformed sister. She knocks on my door once too often, and quite frankly I’ve had enough. That’s why I’m going back. 20 years, it must be buried under a couple more layers of dirt by now, but I know it’s still there. Something in me can feel it.
I’m going back to that spot on the walk home from school, the school that’s torn down by now, I’m going to dig up that piece of mystery and put this thing back in it — if it’s the last thing I do.
